I have been in recovery now for 1 year, 5 months, and 15 days to be exact on today’s date which is 12/9/2021. To be honest, I don’t really remember the exact date I got sober, but that is the date I was pretty sure was close to the day I got sober when I was in outpatient rehab. The first 9 month were pretty much a huge haze for me to be totally honest, it was so hard to focus on anything. I however keep lots of journals and notes of all the things I had goings. I tried to start this blog back in January of this year, but just didn’t have the energy to do so until I found Reiki.  

I did my recovery a little different from most. I went to outpatient rehab at an amazing local establishment and met some amazing pacificators there. One I had known from previous visits in a different department many years ago when I had a mental break down and self-medicated for years with alcohol and drugs. When he saw me, he gave me a huge smile and handshake and said, “Good to see you on this side of things!” I was shocked he had remembered me it had been so long. But it made me feel good I had made a good impression on him. 

I tried to go to an AA meeting, but it didn’t feel right to me. I tried another local group, and it didn’t either. I tried zoom meetings, since I did get sober at the beginning of the Covid-19 Pandemic. It made Zoom meetings very readily available. But they didn’t feel right either. I spent a lot of time alone, or with my close friends and family. I still went to the bas. No, I never drank, YES it was hard as hell to not drink the first few times lol. But I love Karaoke. It’s my other secret passion in life. I’m not good at it by any means, but I love to do it. 

So, by me still wanting to go to the bars, and sing, most places I went to, I didn’t fit in. So, I made my own foundations, and made my own honor code. I did what I needed to do for myself. Do I still get triggered? Sometimes, but its random little things you wouldn’t think of on a day-to-day basis. Mostly it’s been since dating, because I also took a year off dating when I got sober so I could truly find myself. And boy howdy have I Found myself!!!! 

I want to Share my 9-step program with the world. I want to help others the way it helped me!!! Below is a graphic design I made of my 9-step program. I hope that it helps you the way that it has helped me.  

Below the picture, I have added the steps and a brief description of each step.  


9 step program broken down 

  1. Came to find mental clarity and realized that it is time for an existential change in our lives. 

This means, you realize it’s time for a change, but you aren’t sure what to do, or how to go about it. You know it’s time for a change though, and that is where Saging Mentality steps in, and helps you choose a new path to go down. 

  1. Found the willingness and open-mindedness to open ourselves to the idea of outside help. 

By opening our minds up to the idea of outside help, we won’t feel alone in out endeavors of trying to change our lives around. Having outside help, it will encourage you to stay on the right path. 

  1. Made a commitment to ourselves and began working on our own shadow work in favor of inner healing. 

Shadow work is diving deep within your conscious and subconscious minds to find the hidden parts of yourself you have kept away with your addictions and trauma.  By doing so, you will be able to heal those open wounds, instead of masking them and hiding them.  

  1. Created a stronger support system than any we had been able to find before. 

Creating a strong support system, will help make you stronger as a person. Knowing that when you have a crisis, or feel you are in crisis mode, you will always have someone to turn to when you need them, even if it is just a text message. This will help give you the self-confidence you will need in the future to get through a triggering event on your own.  

  1. Opened up to our support system, realizing that open communication was the key to our success. 

Communication truly is key when changing your life around. While it may be hard to admit to your support system some of the things that have happened in the past, you know who you can trust with the right information, because YOU picked out your own support system! 

  1. Opened ourselves up to the idea of a Higher Power greater than ourselves who could help guide us on our paths. 

When we open up to the idea that there is something greater than ourselves in this universe, be it a Deity, God, Angels, or really anything you truly believe is helping you become a better person from the inside out, it helps you know right from wrong, and how to navigate your way through this life path better. 

  1. Made amends with the loved ones whom we had hurt in an appropriate manner for each harm to be rectified. 

When we sit down alone with ourselves doing our shadow work, many times guilt and shame will come up of things we have down wrong to the ones we love in the past due to our addictions, or our own trauma. How we handle ourselves in our new path of life, and how we handle those we hurt is going to show them and ourselves that we have changed our behaviors.  Making amends can be anything from an in-person apology to writing a letter, to giving a speech to a group of people. It what you see fit and necessary for each individual person.  

  1. Committed our lives to our Higher Power and highest version of ourselves. 

Committing your life to a higher power and your higher self means that you are doing the best and the greatest good not only for the world around you, but for yourself as well. Your higher self would be you, being true to who you really are and who you genuinely want to be in life, not just numbing the pain and past away, with addictions or masking it with old coping mechanisms anymore. You learn your true calling in life and pursue it and enjoy it. You do not just create a weekend escape but a full life you enjoy! 

  1. Commenced to work for the greater good, in line with our individual soul purpose, and for the betterment of the planet as a whole. 

Now that you Feel you have come to the full understanding of life, you spend the rest of your life working towards your goals, your visions, and bettering yourself, and the world around you, for yourself and others. Not only does this get rid of the chaos around you, but when rough patches do happen, because life does through us lessons, you are capable of handling it in the way you want, not in the old programming or patterning you used to.  


~Namaste Mary~

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